"It won't stop me from eating bacon."

Perfect timing, swine flu. Just what the world needs - another global crisis.

As the numbers of swine flu deaths and confirmed cases rise worldwide, so does the fear mongering and transcontinental panic.

So we don't have color coded threat levels, but mere numbers will work just fine as a scare tactic. We don't have definitive answers about suspected vs. confirmed cases, but color-coded interactive graphics certainly depict the global ramifications. See for yourself: (http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/interactive/2009/apr/28/swine-flu-outbreak-mexico-pandemic) Don't the concentric circles somehow make it scarier?

What is it that's so utterly fascinating about swine flu? I remember SARS and the Avian flu, but I don't recall the extreme fear mongering and constant vigilance that this swine is getting. I don't recall the media obsession. Is it a different animal every four years? What's next? Kitty flu? A Chihuahua virus?

I am disgusted once again by a large corporation's ability to drown out individual voices and unwillingness to own up to its mistakes. Smithfield has turned La Gloria into a pig farming town to the epicenter of a potential global crisis.

I wonder how could this happen. Pandemics seem soooo 16th century. Nowadays it seems there is nothing an organic remedy and a GNC ammunity builder can't fix. Quarinting and shutting down cities feels old world and pre-digital age, but then again, at least we are not nailing people into their homes and posting signs about death to all ye who come on treeposts a la the plague.

Today, we have something even scarier: the interent. As a result of at-your-fingertips information, the layman craves expertise merely because he can easily acquire it. Understanding the mutation of genes and the specific means by which the disease is passed from animals to humans has gone from esoteric to common knowledge. It is not enough to merely know swine flu exists; we need to know the why and how of it all. Wasn't it better when we were all in the dark and just really, really afraid?

The news is filled with prefunctory details that seek to fuel the frenzy: CVC pharmacy will see a rise in hand sanitizer sales! The VP wouldn't set foot in Mexico, so neither should you! Keep your cool, says the Prez, but be very, very afraid. Lip service has become the only service. We keep commenting on the commentary because speaking gives us some sort of solace. Words fill a vaccum, and informatıon ıs the best defence.

At the end of the day, all we can do is live our lives. I don't eat pork anyway, but I'm not sure how I'd feel even if I did.

Carry on, then. Carry on.

Lost and Unfounded

Me looking melancholy as I mourn the loss of my camera.


Lost or forgotten items are par for the course when it comes to overseas travelling.
Still, I like to pride myself on being a notch above the average traveller due to my organizational savvy; I've kept it together for nearly two years by strategically placing and obsessively compulsively checking and rechecking my bags and bod for irreplacables: wallet, camera, keys, phone. I've kept it together - until now.

As soon as I realized my camera was gone while on holiday in Italy, the sinking feeling that accompanies the process of important item recovery set it. Next, the self-flagellation: somehow I have failed in the process of being a functioning individual. You irresponsible, scatterbrained, unkept woman! Yes, the loss of my camera somehow translated into failure as a human being.

Then there's the creepiness factor: what with all the information available out there about me on the internet, there is something that feels stragely violating about the fact that someone has access to a digital gallery of my life. I have nothing to hide (sorry, no scandalous or naughty natured pics available) - just standard tourist and hanging out with friends fare. Stil, I feel silghtly undone by the whole thing.

So I attempted recovery. I posted on craigslist and spent a half hour navigating the Florence City Hall home page. While in Florence I retraced my steps, asked waiters and conciergies if they'd come across my digital camera - so innocent, still seemingly new after two years together. We had a good run, my little canon elf powershot and I.

And then, after the denial and anger, I began to question the nature of my camera's existence. Honestly, why did I care about him so much? I delete many of the shots I take, or if I keep them, I don't bother to look at them. (The overly-critical perfectionist in me cringes when I see myself in photos). As for the validity of photos as memory triggers or nostalgic reminders I have no doubt, but those are not the primary reasons for the existence of my photos.

I guess I realized I like taking pictures more than having them. Carrying around my camera gives me an unexpected sense of control - that somehow elusive moments in my life aren't slipping away because I can capture them if I so desire. I miss the power of self-definition my camera gave me more than the object itself.